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"Well, now, there's no need to be rude, eh?"
From its dangerous national obsession with "hockey" to its terrifying rational health care system, Lucas has always considered Canada to be one of the most un-American nations north of the border. The average Canadian, he thinks, may look like an otherwise sane, stable, mature individual, but that's just a disguise to cover up the sane, stable, mature individual underneath.
But now they've opened a Tim Hortons in Duluth, and that's one step too far.
Backed by absolutely nobody, and surrounded by people suggesting that maybe he needs to switch to decaf for a while, Lucas is stonewalled whenever he tries to convince people of the creeping menace posed by the Great White North. If he doesn't act, and soon, he fears that something might happen. Something moderate and reasonable, he suspects he really doesn't know what it might be but moderate and reasonable has never been the American way.
But what can he do? One man against the world's second largest country by area? It's miles beyond what he's ever gone up against.
Or, perhaps, kilometers. That's what they use, eh?